5 things you need to know if you are trying so hard to recover.
“When you keep adding more tasks to the already stressful to do list, you need to stop doing it.”
As a coach, this is something people wouldn’t expect me to say.
But it takes some observation to see what isn’t actually working and sometimes that can be doing healthy things that are not done in a healthy way.
“It’s not what you do it’s how you do it.”
Firstly if you are doing something from a place of fear, you are more likely to create more fear.
If you do things from a place of desperation, you will create more desperation.
I have seen many people email me lately saying they are STRUGGLING even though they are trying so hard to get better.
They say “I have tried everything and NOTHING works.”
In there lies the problem.
Sometimes PUSHING THROUGH is not actually the answer. Sometimes less is more can be the answer. Sometimes not trying harder is the answer.
Trying hard from a place of fear and desperation is only adding more stress to an already stressed body and brain.
It doesn’t matter how MAGICAL the pill, potion or process you are taking or doing is, because if you are doing it from a place of this nature, you will probably not progress that far at all. A constant battle between the push and pull of life.
It’s like holding onto a toxic relationship that you know you should have left years ago but you are still there holding on even though it’s not working out.
“It’s not what you do but how you do it that is the key.”
Whether it is meditation, movement, stopping negative thoughts, even trying to be positive all the time can actually work against you. Seriously… If you are having to try harder and it is causing you more stress than good. Ask yourself.. What do I really need?
As one of my mentors said – Even too much of a good thing can be bad for you.
So here are my 5 tips for you if you are in this place.
1. Stop what is not working.
Literally just stop. How? Ask yourself the question why am I still doing this? What am I scared of? What do I fear? Why aren’t I letting go? Ask those questions and question whether the beliefs around them are actually true. More often then not it is a made up story that isn’t actually reality.
Instead of looking for the next solution, just get simple. Stop overcomplicating shit and do what works. Running around looking for the next best, will only create the same behavior months down the track.
3. Get re-centered and back in control.
Calm yourself down, calm your nervous system down. This will help you make better decisions and create space for you to start doing what works for you instead of going around in a vicious cycle.
4. Ask better questions.
Literally, ask what do I actually need to do? The answer might be nothing. Or it might be something. Figure out what is RIGHT for YOU, not what someone else thinks you should do.
5. Get perspective.
You do this by getting outside help from someone who is experienced in what you are going through to get a different perspective and outlook on your situation. Or create time and space in your life to observe your behaviors and way of life to create awareness for change to happen.
Remember there is no perfect, and maybe that is the message you can take away from today, but start to focus on WHAT YOU actually need to do, not what your mind thinks you should do or what someone else said you should do.
Hope that helps,
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Toby Morrison – CFS health – Founder.